From Charisma: A Letter to the Child in my Care

You came into our lives fresh from the NICU at 4 months old. Your life up until then was full of procedures, medication and medical professionals. When I got the call for you, I was hesitant as you were the youngest placement I’d gotten a call for. After hearing your story, I had no choice but to take you in. Our world changed that day. Honestly, those first few weeks were hectic. You would cry uncontrollably and barely slept. I doubted myself as a mom and questioned if I was qualified to take care of you. We tried different things to comfort you and eventually learned you had a dairy intolerance. So, we switched your formula and you smiled for the first time a few days after that.

We watched you grow from an underweight miserable newborn to a chunky happy baby. Over those next few months, you reached so many milestones and doubled your weight. It was a night and day difference.

"At 11 months old you started walking. I think I scared you with my excited squeals, but you eventually got used to it and challenged yourself to go further each day. My heart could’ve exploded with love."

All I could think about was how little you were when you first got here. Now you wait by the door for brother and daddy when you hear keys and demand your daily hugs and kisses. You started running 2 weeks after walking. Imagine my surprise to see you running full speed down the hallway whenever you heard the refrigerator opening. Now you climb on to the couch and jump off without a fear in the world. My little superhero.

Unfortunately, we know that our time is running short, and you will be leaving us soon. I try not to think about it too much as I know that will be one of the saddest days of my life. But it makes the time we have left so much more valuable. I cherish every day that we spend together and push myself to do all sorts of activities just to experience them with you. I’ve taken so many photos of all your “firsts” and can’t wait to add more in the future. Although we will be sad when you leave, we’ll also be grateful for the time we’ve had together. I get asked a lot about how I deal with the heartbreak when a child leaves my home, and my answer is that “leaving” is such a small part of the fostering journey. With the kids that come into care, a lot of them don’t have the best experiences. We get to be safe houses for them. We get to provide them with experiences they would not have otherwise. We are so blessed to have you in our lives. And even when you leave, please remember you will always have a place here with us. You are our family and nothing will change that. I love you so much and I can’t wait to see the person that you will become.

Love,

Mom